i should sleep

it's late. always.
i'm up trying to finish some art, which entails me crashing on the couch while gilmore girls is playing. the christmas lights are on. it's reminiscent of this time last year when the christmas lights were on and i was finishing some art. after a first date with muslim.

i'm at peace. (funny that statement comes after the previous sentence)

maybe because christmas lights by coldplay is playing.
(sorry if you're getting sick of the coldplay business, because it's not going away folks.)

it was a rather tumultuous weekend, but i'm at peace;
a little worse for the wear, but coming out on top (eventually).
and thursday, my finals will be done.
tomorrow, my art final will be done.
maybe some day i'll find out about the progress of the visual arts department and their decisions about who is going to be accepted or not.

lots of people to be grateful for. too many to count, but not too many to love.

ess oh ess

focusing is a near impossibility right now.
usually illuminated manuscripts are rad for me. but my brain is just done.

too bad i have 1/3 of my art final to finish by tomorrow (and i haven't even started it).
also too bad: my quiz for new testament. and my breakdown to alycia today. good thing she's wonderful.

will get back to you soon.

homework neverending

et maintenant, je vais commencer par les choses importants.

*whispers* and now, i'm going to start with the big stuff.
wish me luck


SIDE NOTE: and happy birthday to the church! 180-years-old today.

obituary

i think my brain has just reached the end of its existence.

in the immortal words of rory from gilmore girls, "i distinctly heard a ping in the back of my brain."

it was there.
too many essays in a concentrated amount of time.
too much to think about.

life. work. school. pride and prejudice. looking-glass. life. joie de vivre. essays. art. life. powerade. pancakes. life. scales (not the weight kind). phone calls. life. patience. oh, and did i mention
life? the word looks foreign to me now, because i've spelled it a lot and stared at it for a while.

so, fare thee well, brain. you've served me devotedly for 20 plus years.
i wish you the best.
actually, no, i don't. because without you i'm going to be sitting in this blue chair, at my desk, in my room with audrey hepburn pictures and a bing crosby one somewhere in there for the rest. of. my. existence.

not moving. because without you, i can't move.

stupid brain. why'd you have to give up on me?

Best. Class. Ever.

My Intro to Lit class saw the most class participation that it has ever seen. Most of the time, everybody's silent and my professor goes on about prosody and syllabic verse (which I actually find interesting, but I guess it's not everybody's cup of tea).

It all began with Lisa, a girl in my class, moving up a desk to the front row in the middle of the lecture (this is a small class of about 20, just keep that in mind). My first brief thought was that she was trying to suck up to the teacher by being in the front row, but then I thought, Nah. Plus, I really like Lisa, so I didn't particularly care that she moved. Then I watched this kid in our class and her exchange some glances and laughs and a few whispered sentences. So I thought that there was some sexual tension going on between them (what that had to do with her moving desks, I have no idea).

Then it all became clear. The girl that had been sitting behind her freaked out all of a sudden because there was a "huge" spider on the desk Lisa had been sitting in. Everybody moved around in their desks to see this spider, and my professor was being funny, but also trying to keep the class under some amount of control. For some ridiculous reason, no one decided to kill it. I was sitting there thinking, About 2/3 of the men in this room are near that spider and they're not man enough to do it! (potentially sexist remark, I know).

Of course, with the spider still lurking around, the people closest to it weren't paying attention at all, and despite my professor's attempts at getting the class to focus back on William Carlos Williams' "The Red Wheelbarrow," it wasn't happening.

That's when chaos ensued. All at once, there was a resounding gasp from several girls, and many of them stood up and hurried out of their seats. Apparently the spider was a jumping spider and had excavated its way to the other girl's desk. Oh, the mayhem.

A guy sitting in the row next to me was laughing and mocking the situation, and was yelling, "Quick! Kill it! Before it lifts the desk and starts throwing things!" Haha. I laughed. Finally, the guy who had been flirting with Lisa decided to murder the creature, much to the chagrin of my professor. I think he was a little opposed to the death of the spider, and I'm not sure why (he said he didn't even like them).

After that, the professor went on about a time when he was in school and a dog was in class. His professor was lecturing on the Salem witch trials, and for some random reason, the dog was just barking sporadically and it was really grating on the teacher. Finally, he slammed his book and notes shut and said, "Class dismissed!" My professor remarked, "It's like he thought this dog was an imp of Satan!"

Haha. Oh, that professor. He kills me. I find myself laughing a lot in that class, but I find that I'm usually the only one laughing. He has a really off-the-wall sense of humor that I think random people like me appreciate. Oh well.

*gasping* Almost..... *gasp* done.....

Yup.

I'm almost done with my first semester of college.

Now, not entirely a big deal, but when I felt like I wouldn't make it at all, like all the emotional rollercoasters I've been on the past few months would kill me, like school would be so hard I could barely function (and it wasn't)....it's kind of a big deal. I'll feel pretty good about myself when I can say I've finished a semester of college.

I've got some experience now, and now I know what I would do different next semester. And I also can't forget that life isn't all about studying your brains out for a good grade, but at the same time, it's not about being a freakin' couch potato (like I was for at least a month when I discovered The Office) either.

Bring it on, finals. I can KICK your butt. I will conquer.

I feel so accomplished

Oh, guess who created a Wikipedia page?

Ya. I did.

Well, technically, I just erased what limited information was already there and put in the information I had (it was for an assignment, and my professor okay-ed me doing that)...but still...all that information is from me. Unless somebody came in and edited it, which is highly possible.

If you really want to see it, click here, although I must warn you that it is about vomiting and the fear of vomiting. Not necessarily pleasant (the reason it's kind of a weird topic is because part of the exercise was to be completely unbiased in our research and how we wrote it, so we had to choose something that kind of weirded us out...vomiting weirds me out...).

Enjoy. Maybe...

A non-bun in the non-oven

I hope that all of you had a fantastic Thanksgiving weekend (by the sounds of it on your blogs, you all did). I know mine was fantastic and filled with 60 degree weather, Steve Jobs (don't ask), and not worrying about anything (which may or may not be a downfall in the upcoming weeks before finals).

I've been walking around like I'm 8 1/2 months pregnant lately. My friend from California convinced me to do this intense leg workout with him the day before I was to sit in a car for a 10 hours drive. Smart move, Kayleigh. Smart move. Now, my legs and gluteus maximus hurt so bad, I kind of just waddle my way around my apartment and up the stairs from hell (which are more hell-ish than ever before, due to my condition). It's really quite hilarious. Getting up from the couch is quite a feat.

I'm very much looking forward to the end of the next few weeks. If I can just survive finals, I think it will be a miracle. Of course, after finals, a new semester starts, which means I have to buy new books (which means a potential mandatory trip to *shudder* the BYU Bookstore....I think I would rather have a gaping head wound...ya...you heard me). And if this stupid scholarship from the state would just come through, it would make my life a whole lot easier. I'm ready to bust a cap on all these broken promises from them. They told me I would get my funding this past month, and NOTHING has come. Thank you Utah Department of Education (or whoever, technically, the scholarship comes from...I should probably look that up before bashing them...oops).

Anyways...done ranting now. I should be more thankful than I'm sounding at this point. We'll see what the rest of the day brings.