Tuesday, December 14, 2010

aujourd'hui

when i was a junior in high school, i wanted to be the student body artist more than i wanted a lot of things. probably more than i wanted most relationships to work out with boys. it was a big deal.

so, in no uncertain terms, i tried really, really hard to get my portfolio up to par. i drew lancers (our school's mascot) and i studied what they looked like online. i sketched. i talked to the advisor. i talked to the people who were in student government to see what i could do that would put me above the rest.

when i walked up to the door of the advisor's office in may of 2007 with one of my best friends, he covered up the paper and went down the list, showing the names one at a time. when it got to the artist, my name was there.

my name. artist.

it was one of the most gratifying moments of my life. i had worked so hard. i had done my best. and it paid off.

fast forward to college.

when i realized summer of 2009 that i wanted to pursue an art degree, those art students became my idols. they were the elite group of people who were able to get into the elusive art program that i wanted so badly to be a part of. every time i walked into the harris fine arts center, i felt like i was a little kid trying so hard to become a grown up. i felt like a wannabe.

then i decided to apply. i worked hard. i talked to people in the program. i worked and sketched and drew and looked at reference photos until my hands were permanently black with charcoal and my eyes were getting weary from looking at paper so long. then, one day two weeks ago, i submitted my work.

it was done. out of my hands. now, skill and divine intervention were the only things keeping me alive. giving me hope.

i got my proverbial name on the list this morning in my inbox.
after the initial "congratulations" i kept looking for the "but we regret to inform you." it never came.

and today i walked into the harris fine arts center,
feeling completely and totally justified saying
that i am an actual art student.



a still-life drawing i did last year.
this was my baby.
this was my confidence booster.

4 comments:

Brittany Erin said...

Wow, that still life is phenomenal. And I'm so glad you got in. You deserved it.

Captain Danger said...

Awesome, Kayleigh! Remember how I told you yesterday that you'd get into the art program? I hate to say I told you so, but, I told you so. :)

Emily J. said...

this - is stinking awesome!! sorry i didn't see it before! nate just asked "is that a drawing?" and i said yes!

Nae chan said...

Kayleigh, this is so neat! I already knew that you were in the program, but this post really shows something about who you are. You never give up, even when you feel inadequate. Your hard work and talents will take you far, but that is because you have something that a lot of people don't- you have the courage to try! I am so proud of you, girl!

PS, this still-life drawing is amazing. You are so so good!