Saturday, June 5, 2010
you really don't have to read this
Straight up. Right now, I'm not listening to music. I'm listening to my laptop about on its last leg as the fan whirs louder and louder. I'm feeling vulnerable. Mostly because I'm not sure what to blog about. I'm not really sure about myself. Not in a negative way, or in any kind of emo way. I just...am. My purple room is a mess. There are clothes from the thrift store on my bed and a box of food I'm taking to D.C. on the floor. I'm thinking. I watched Valkyrie tonight (for the third time in my life) which led me to thinking. I'm on a Tom Cruise kick right now. I've watched Mission Impossible 2 probably three times in the past week, and I plan on commandeering Top Gun as well as the other two Mission Impossible movies from my mom's vast collection of movies. I blame The Missionary for this. And for a lot of things. My legs hurt. I wanted to go running tonight, because I'm trying to be good about my health and all that, but it was about 10:30 pm when I decided that, so I decided against it. I napped today at 5:30 pm. Who naps that late? It felt great, though. My room feels nice because it's colder than the rest of my house. And it's lots colder than the stifling room I have down in P-Town. I have plenty of secrets locked away right now that will come out eventually. For my sanity. I love art, but I have no motivation to do it right now. Which sort of upsets me. And by sort of, I mean really. But I know that I'm the only one that can change that. I fell in love with a boy. For whatever reason, there are two loaves of whole wheat bread on my nightstand. I won't complain, though, because they'll come with me back to my apartment, and I'll have bread again instead of the stale bread that's been in my fridge for about a month. I really love my purple room. And I really love that I get to go to church tomorrow. Because, despite all the transience that occurs in life for a twenty-year-old, at least that's one thing I can always count on.